new phone case//god is FAITHFUL

casetify is my jam. I adore the student discount as much as I adore the exchangeable back plates.

I chose this one, available here.

I look forward to having this near-constant reminder of God's faithfulness with me so much. having an in-your-face reminder of your truth and goals for the years is so powerful. 

much love,

sj

word of the year 2017//F A I T H F U L

last monday, I realized that 2017 was sneaking up on me. that time last year, I was already very aware of the message on my heart that brave was to be the word for 2016. brave and I have had a good ol' time, with highs and lows, and great improvement. I had received a new journal for my birthday that I planned on saving for use with my yearly devotional beginning with the new year. however, I decided to start then, and journal out my journey to my word of the year.

I had two ideas going into this week, thoughts that might make it to my word of the year. the first was content. I texted my cousin this reasoning for thinking about content:

"and this year's going to be one of a lot of change and probably disappointment since I'm graduating & finding a job & stuff

plus it's something I struggle with anyway--like being content with not having any husband prospects yet & being content with a less-than-perfect church family & being content with myself as a human"

so, content was definitely an option. second was joy. these were my thoughts on joy, a few days later:

"I’m kind of leaning towards joy at the moment, because I feel like contentment is part of joy, so I would be killing two birds with one stone? I don’t know…

plus since ‘brave’ really helped but obviously I still have bad anxiety and joy is like the opposite of anxiety"

I gave my word options over to my cousin, c, and my best friend, j, and asked them their opinions. c really liked content. j really liked joy. (just now seeing the correlations between their votes and their initials, btw). so that was not helpful. I was so determined to chose between to two and I simply couldn't. so on thursday, I prayed earnestly during my devotional time. I prayed that God would show me what the truth He wanted me to live in for the next year. and ohmygosh He did it. I was doing she reads truth's holding tight to permanent study. 

the first day, my notes ended in 'just as He was faithful, He is faithful'

the second day, I journaled that I could trust 'in God's faithfulness to improve me'

the third day, I wrote 'He who calls me is faithful'

the fourth day (December 30th), I noted that God is 'faithful to never let go or give up on me' 

today was a grace day. a day to reflect. I looked back over my notes and realized the emphasis God had placed on my heart was evident in them--faithful. 

over the next year, I will focus on the truth that God is faithful. God is faithful in my aunt's breast cancer diagnoses. God is faithful in my stressful semester of student teaching. God is faithful in my upcoming 21st birthday. God is faithful in my upcoming college graduation. God is faithful in my search for a post-graduation job. God is faithful whether I find a boyfriend in 2017 or not. God is faithfulness is not related to my physical appearance. God's faithfulness is not related to my emotional state. God's faithfulness is only related to His character. His never-failing character. He probably won't teach me about His faithfulness every day of 2017. but He will be faithful to me, regardless of what this year brings. 

and so, my word of the year in 2017 is faithful. over the next few days I'll be pursuing my phone case, necklace, and wall prints for the year. I'll be studying songs, hymns, poems, and verses relating to God's faithfulness. I will prepare for a year of reminders of God's faithfulness. 

much love,

sj

R E C A P//word of the year 2016//B R A V E

last year it was very clear to me that brave was my word for 2016. following some chaotic and violent events in our world in 2015 paired with my first year of college, my anxiety was a full blown mess. I knew in my head that God's perfect love casts out all fear, but I also knew in my heart that it is simply not that easy to overcome.

often in the church, the message that is communicated to christians is that God does not give us a spirit of fear, which while entirely true is also hard to hear when you struggle with anxiety. it can give the message that you're failing in your faith. you begin to doubt your relationship with God and begin to feel like your faith cannot possibly be real, because if it was surely you'd be able to overcome anxiety overnight by singing worship songs and memorizing scripture. but it's just not that easy.

I chose brave for my 2016 word because I knew that my christian identity was not one that cowered in fear of life's uncertainty, but one that stood unafraid on the name of God. I am by no means cured of anxiety--I still have days or weeks when leaving my house is painful if not impossible, and nights of sleeplessness and nightmares. but overall, I am much more confident in my identity in Christ and where it leaves me as a christian. I know that regardless of what happens during my life on earth I am secure in my eternal outcome. I wore a necklace engraved with the word 'brave' and I used a phone case that said 'be brave' on the back. my bravery failed me when I was asked to house sit for a friend and had to drive back to their house three times after I left because I was so anxious something had gone wrong. my bravery failed me a few weeks ago when I was in a car wreck--I still have not been able to drive again. however, I was brave enough to start a new business as a usborne books & more independent consultant. I was brave enough to go on a trip by myself in may, brave enough to take a new job over the fall.  I am at the very least brave-r than I was on December 31st 2015.

so today, I've chosen my word of the year for 2017. it's different. a different concept, and a different goal. but more on that in 2017.

much love and bravery in these final hours of 2016--
sj
p.s.//louie giglio has an incredible sermon on being a christian with anxiety called 'when darkness falls'. on his years of struggle that is so comforting to hear a spiritual leader talk about. I listen to it in my good times and my bad times and it is always a blessing. you can listen to it here. please listen to it--if not for yourself than for your friends, family, and people in the community with anxiety.